Parenting Tips: Raising respectful children

Merci. Gracias. Danke. Grazie. Thank you.

In any language, showing appreciation by saying "thank you" is the foundation of good manners. And, in most cultures, parents and guardians are usually the role models of good manners.

You can meet that challenge by training your child from the cradle up to show their appreciation by their words, actions and by their response to gifts. Training them at an early age will provide great lessons that will stick with them through adulthood. The cycle of thanks can continue as your kids pass on the lessons they have learned to their children.

Some great ways to raise thankful kids include: 1) teaching them from an early age to say thank you verbally; 2) helping them to send follow-up thank you cards and letters; and, 3) encouraging them to buy small gifts for family members, sick neighbors and special teachers. Over time, these methods will help raise your child's thanksgiving factor.

Whatever method you choose, here are some ways you can ensure that you are raising thankful kids:

Be Thankful. If you want to raise thankful kids, you have to consistently show and give appreciation. That's because as mirror images of their parents, kids mimic what their parents say and do. Consider this: Do you properly thank your children for the things they do around the house to assist you or help with their younger siblings? Do you show appreciation throughout the day to family, friends and strangers? Do you treat grocery store and fast food employees with respect and dignity? If the answer is yes, then you’re already a step ahead in raising thankful kids. If the answer is no, then you may want to change your habits so that your children can follow suit.

Remove Stumbling Blocks. Parental approval can be a stepping stone or a stumbling block on the road to raising thankful kids. Don’t fall into the parent trap of thwarting your children’s efforts at showing thanks. For example, if one of your children is in a store and wants to purchase a gift for someone and you don’t have the ready cash, suggest a homemade card instead. Or if you receive a gift that you don’t like, don’t grumble about the pitfalls of the gift in your kids’ presence. Instead, show appreciation for the giver’s generosity.

Provide a training ground. Putting your children in different settings will help them to learn to be appreciative at all times. When you dine out, train your youngster how to treat the wait staff. Give pointers on how to order food and how to show thanks for service rendered, including the importance of tipping. In addition to dining out, you can use special occasion parties, like birthdays and holiday dinners, as training grounds for lessons in thanksgiving.

Emphasize the meaning of the gift not the value. Raising thankful kids becomes easier as you teach them how to appreciate any gift, no matter how large or small. Help them to understand that it’s the meaning behind the gift (that someone loved them enough to give them one) than the price tag that is important. One way to do this is to encourage your children to make homemade gifts. Such gifts are especially great because they reinforce the importance of giving from the heart – not the pocket.