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Has it been a while since the sight of your significant other filled you with a sense of anticipation that something fun was about to happen? If you've settled into a rut with your partner, where you seem to meet up at the end of the workday, grab some dinner, watch TV and then go to bed, it could be time to rediscover a sense of play in your relationship. Try some of these ways of making your relationship fun again.
Memory lane
Think back to what you used to do together for fun when you first met. Did you have a shared interest or hobby? Did you love going to old movie festivals or spending weekends camping? Make a list of five shared activities that used to be fun to do together.
Now look at your present lifestyle. Why don't you do these things as a couple anymore? Maybe you're working too hard, or maybe you've just stopped bothering to make the effort. But if you really want to recapture a sense of fun in your relationship, you must take the initiative. Why not schedule one of those activities on your list for this weekend?
There are a million excuses for putting this off, but you should realize that making this kind of effort could end up saving your relationship. So if you've already arranged to have dinner with some acquaintances, or work colleagues this weekend, pick up the phone and cancel it now. While you're there, call that camping ground, theatre or art gallery and find out some concrete details about what they have to offer this very weekend. Make a commitment and make a booking right then and there.
What if you can't even remember when this relationship was fun?
If the concepts of 'relationship' and 'fun' seem incompatible to you, it's time for some radical action. Think about your own interests and those of your partner. Maybe you're both serious workaholics, students or just terminally bored with your life together. In this case, an injection of exciting activity may be just what the doctor ordered.
You may both be prime candidates for some action adventures. Do some research into what's available in your area, or book a weekend away - there's nothing like some bungee-jumping, white water rafting, or mountain climbing to get the adrenalin pumping and to make you feel alive again.
Maybe the only time you get to spend together is devoted to chores or discussions about money. Make a pact with each other that you will spend an entire Saturday afternoon without talking about this stressful issue, and without doing a single chore.
Does it really matter if the laundry is not folded or the floor not vaccuumed? Leave the weeds where they are for another week. Make your relationship a priority and see how much fun you can have when you try.
There are plenty of things you can do with this Saturday afternoon. When was the last time you window shopped, after hanging out in a friendly coffee shop and having the perfect creamy latte and a rich slice of chocolate gateaux? Ask for two cake forks and share the experience. Or pack up a simple picnic and a bottle of good red, and drive to a scenic spot, where you can enjoy the soothing effects of nature, and and the chance to reconnect with your partner.
Romance is fun
When you're just trying to make it through the week, it's pretty easy to forget about romance. But a little romance now and then can really energize your relationship and remind you of why you're with your partner. Little gestures that make the other person feel special will put you both in a better mood, and remind you of why you got together in the first place.
A single flower or little box of hand-made chocolates can radically change the nature of the week. Once you start smiling at each other again, its impossible not to yearn to do more and more things together and start to enjoy each other's company, rather than take it for granted.
Of course, a grand romantic gesture can have an even more long-lasting effect and remind you of what a fun relationship feels like. Plan a secret romantic weekend with you partner, and greet them on Friday afternoon with two packed bags and a waiting cab.
A mid-week dinner at your favourite restaurant is also a lot of fun - it's an unexpected treat in the middle of the week, and is a clear statement that you can have fun together anytime, anywhere, and don't need to wait for the weekend to enjoy spending some quality time as a couple.
Redisovering a sense of play in your relationship is clearly not an impossible task. It takes some thought and a strong desire to reconnect with your partner, but the rewards include a stronger partnership and a deeper feeling of contentment with the quality of the life you have made together.
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