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If you've ever considered throwing a surprise party for one of your shy friends, you may have hesitated, and even decided not to go ahead with your plans, for fear of causing more embarrassment than joy. But it is possible to surprise even the shyest person with a party in their honor, and to still be good friends with them at the end of the night!
Make the surprise gentle.
Even the most extroverted personality in the world may have reason to pause for a second when confronted with blazing lights and a crowd of people shrieking "SURPRISE!" But this situation is the stuff of nightmares for a shy person, who may never forgive you for placing them at the center of such a concentrated burst of attention.
You need to ease them into the surprise situation, rather than risk giving them a coronary as a birthday present. One option is to have a daytime party, where the guests are more relaxed and not so pumped. A party held during the day seems to make for a low-key event, which can be more casual
and less-structured.
If you'd rather go for the greater drama of evening, however, there are still ways of lessening the trauma of a surprise party on the shy guest of honor. Bring the guest to the site of the party fairly early in the evening
so he or she can greet the guests as THEY arrive. She won't know who's on the guest list, so the constant arrival of unexpected faces will still be a surprise. But they'll comprise a series of little, pleasant surprises, instead of being a horrendous and concentrated source of stress.
Provide some distractions.
Say you HAVE opted for the approach with involves a mass yelling of "SURPRISE!" You'd better have organized some distractions immediately following the moment of ambush. If you leave your friend standing there gaping and blushing for more than two seconds, you may have just set the
scene for making a lifetime of apologies.
Lead her out of the spotlight straight away. Drag her over to some of her favourite people on the edge of the room and allow her a minute to regain her composure. Hand her a stiff drink. Shout directions to the person in charge of the stereo. Direct the party's attention to those goofy guests who have just turned up late and missed all the excitement.
These are just some of the approaches you can use to soften the blow of the surprise. Of course, if you're really worried, you can make the ultimate gesture of friendship. Take your friend into your confidence before the party and make her promise to look surprised!
This way, you turn the conspiracy around - and your friend can then secretly laugh that the guests are the unwitting victims of the surprise after all. This is sometimes the only option if your friend is seriously shy. It may be your only hope of combining your friendship with her, and an
overwhelming social occasion where she is in the center of the social spotlight.
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