With financial matters, as well as other aspects, you've got to have calm discussions and try to respect the other person's viewpoint. Also understand that sometimes it's not going to be a total agreement. As a matter of fact, many issues in relationships you are not going to have a final answer to. A lot of people strive for that absolute agreement; maybe it will happen, but maybe it won't. It helps to know that somewhere in your feeling level, it's okay to have fuzzy areas where some issues are dealt with and some are not dealt with. You are trying to go along with the other person, even if you don't think it's totally right; that's compromise and negotiation. It can happen, but if there are major financial differences, that often is one of the major conflicts in relationship. I think part of it also is respect to what each person brings to the relationships. Sometimes, there is a real difference in money; who is bringing in the money, or just how did that get acknowledged and what place does the person have and their value in the relationship. A lot of times financial issues end up being about people feeling unvalued, so that has to be dealt with in addition to the numbers that people are trying to figure out and where to put their money.
