Do you have a limited budget for travel? Read on to get an
Do you really, really want to go to the Los Angeles area? Can you only get four days off from work? Do you have enough money to fly there but not enough money to stay in the high-priced hotels around Disneyland and Universal Studios, and you have a dream about going to Newport Beach real-and-in-person? Here are some alternate suggestions:
Alternative #1: Go Ahead and Go.
Plan your vacation in as much in advance as possible. Search the web and get the least expensive airline ticket that you possibly can. Reserve your rental car from "El Cheapo" and hope it runs while you are driving. Pack some of your clothes inside a small ice chest and check it in as luggage.
Instead of staying close to Disneyland and Newport Beach, stay farther out in Chino or Riverside so that you can get a cheaper hotel or motel. Plan on having a forty-five minute to an hour commute, just like the real people that live there. When going to Universal Studios, stay in Palmdale or Lancaster and count on spending about the same time commuting as you did to get to Disneyland from Riverside.
When visiting Newport Beach, park "El Cheapo" rental car on some back street and make sure that no one sees you getting in or out of it. You do not want to appear gauche.
Instead of eating at restaurants, go the grocery store and buy your food. Use the ice chest that you brought and hope that your motel has a microwave. If you are staying in Lancaster or Palmdale during the summer, you will not need one. Just put your food out on the sidewalk and it will cook.
When commuting, console yourself by stopping at interesting historical markers along the way, by listening to local talk radio, and, when stuck in traffic, by thinking that you are really, really glad that you do not actually live there.
Alternative #2: Stay at Home and Pretend.
Plan your vacation as much in advance as possible. Buy foods that you associate with Southern California and stock them at home, including avocados, burritos, and the makings for some good margaritas. If it is in the dead of winter, go to your local Goodwill or Salvation Army Store and pick up some cheap plastic plants to "green-up" your house.
Turn your heater on at home to between seventy-five and eighty-two degrees. Put your on shorts and your aloha shirt, and then stick your feet into your flip-flops. Plop your Mickey Mouse hat on your head, turn on the Disney Channel and sing "It's a Small World" repeatedly. When you are ready to take a break from Disney, watch "Jaws," "The Revenge of the Mummy," "Terminator 2," and other movies on which rides at Universal Studios are based.
Are you ready for some beach action? Run repeats of the television shows "The O.C." and "Arrested Development," both filmed in Newport Beach. For a change of pace, pop in "Beach Party" with Annette Funicello and Frankie Avalon. Annette is a former Mouseketeer and Disney star, Beach Boy's Brian Wilson shows up in a bit part, and, hey, it is at the beach. If you are "vacationing" during the winter and there is snow outside, you will have to forgo any real beach action, but you can fill up your tub, jump in, and play "Pirates of the Caribbean" while singing the "Yo-Ho, Yo-Ho, It's a Pirate's Life for Me" song. If you are "vacationing" during the summer season, you can do all of the above if you like, and also actually go to the beach. Find some water and sand, even if you have to use the kid-next-door's sandbox and a plastic bin full of water in which to stick your feet. Throw on your swimsuit, apply colored zinc oxide to your nose, and liberally slather SPF-15 sun block to the rest of your body. Put on your most expensive sunglasses and practice looking "cool" and "uninterested." You will fit in just fine.
Alternative #3: Get Real
Save your money for next year and spend your time closer to home. Say that you live in Appleton, Wisconsin. You have already been to the Packer's Hall of Fame in Green Bay five million times. You have done Summerfest in Milwaukee every year since you were four years old. Chicago is in driving distance, but hotels will eat into your savings for next year's big trip. Why not plan a tour of unusual festivals and odd spots in Wisconsin? You can start just up the road in Little Chutte at the Annual Great Wisconsin Cheese Festival. Or, why not check out the annual Lumberjack World Championships in Hayward? Who could resist the Annual Watermelon Seed-Spitting and Speed-Eating Championship in Pardeeville?
The point is that regardless of where you live, you have probably not been to or seen all of the unique places and events that are available to you. To find them, go online and type "unusual tourist" and your state into your favorite search engine and see where the search takes you. There are books available that can give you tips on less-traditional places-of-interest at your local library or book store. You will be amazed at how entertained you can keep yourself and your family just by staying "home."
