Children Gaining Independence

Some helpful tips for parents and adult children about how to deal with gaining independence.

When raising children most parents are willing to do everything they can do for their child to make their lives a little easier. There are some parents that are willing to continue with helping their children do everything well into the child's twenties and thirties.

Yet there are parents that are willing to let their children go and are helpful in allowing them to gain their own independence. This independence is moving out and living on their own.

When older children tend to stay on with their parents past the early twenties, there is more friction that rises within the family unit. At this age the child feels he is old enough to make his own decisions, which is true. But, parents still have their rules and regulations, which will make the adult child feel like they are being dictated to.

If finances play a part in an adult child still living at home, there are ways to encourage their independence and helping them gain their self-worth. If the adult is working but does not make enough to afford moving out and the monthly expenses of their own household, then a suitable rent could be charged.

This helps them gain the independence of paying for their own way through life. Some parents put this money aside, using it as a wedding gift or as financial backing in a business.

A good idea is to set how long your adult child, if working, can stay in your home. Arrange a time that you and your child can agree on to move out. If the adult is working, then maybe set a time of after their first raise, then they should look for a place of their own.

Remember it is still your home and if your adult child has a social life, and you do not feel comfortable with he or she bringing their friends into your home, the guidelines should be set before a situation comes about that would be embarrassing for all parties.

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