How To End An Affair When You've Been Cheating

Ending an affair should be done as quickly and painless as possible. Be firm in your decision, but soft in your heart.

Many marriages have their low points as well as their high points Sometimes it is difficult to decipher the difference. This is often the case with extramarital affairs. While engaged in an affair it may provide a psychological high. But eventually many people realize that it is a moral low. When coming to this realization, the next problem that arises is how to end the affair.

There are several ways to end an affair. The method should take into consideration each person's personality and emotional level. The conclusion should also consider the length of the affair and the level of seriousness. Precautions against backlash and repercussions should also be secured, in advance.

If you have been having an affair with a levelheaded, even-tempered person, it is easy to end an affair. Approach the person on neutral territory and cite logical reason why the affair must end. Include the advantage to both of you if it ends. Explain that friendship is not an option because of the possibilities.

If your lover is passionate and quick-tempered, approach them with caution. These personality types tend to elevate situations into an out of control status. Meet this person on their territory. The reason for this is it is easier to leave their environment should they create a scene. People who are quick-tempered are easily offended. Approach this type of lover accepting full responsibility. Emphasize that they are not to blame; it is you who has the issue. This can minimize the hurt they experience, and the potential for a negative scene.

Ending a weekend fling is less complicated than a decade long love affair. If it lasted less than a year one can end it abruptly and without explanation. Change your cell phone number and email addresses. Or you can block the person out of your email, if it would present a hassle to change it. If the person has your work number then you will need to buy a phone interception device. You can buy a device that attaches to the phone line. It is programmable to block specific landline and cell phone numbers. The device works by absorbing and redirecting preprogrammed numbers before the phone rings. It will divert the call to a disconnect tone or endless ringing.

If the relationship has persisted past a few birthdays and Christmases, an official conversation is warranted. If your lover is persistent about continuing the affair, communication must be totally dissolved.

Sometimes an affair turns serious and letting go becomes difficult. When one is ready to leave, but the other isn't, one must use caution and tact when breaking up. It is only correct etiquette to exit the affair attempting to leave the person with the same if not more dignity when one entered it. If the person becomes persistent, use firm measures to eliminate them from your life.

Begin the elimination by blocking phone and email communication. If you work at the same job, attempt to get a transfer or a new job. If the person is persistent with calls and emails, document and record as mush as possible before blocking them. You will need evidence to file a restraining order against the person. In order to keep the restraining order a secret, use a post office box as a mailing address. If possible, without suspicion, move you and your family to another town.

In order to avoid dangerous break ups, precautions against backlash should be taken. Home and job numbers should never be given out. Cell phone numbers should be avoided also. Instead, rent a voicemail number and forward it to your cell phone. When breaking up, you can easily dispose of that number.

Never divulge career or educational information about your spouse. This will avoid access to him/her by your scorned lover. The same discretion should be given to information about extended family.

If the break up is a sour one on your behalf, do not give into "payback" temptation. After the break up, do not talk negatively about your ex-lover. It will cause suspicion amongst those who knew nothing of your affair. It will also give reason for your ex-lover to expose the affair and take the position as your victim. The public will be harsher on you, than the lover, unless they were also married.

Ending an affair should be done as quickly and painless as possible. Be firm in your decision, but soft in your heart. Maintain dignity as well as empathy in your delivery. It can't absolve one of the affair, but it can avoid any backlash damage to your marriage.

© High Speed Ventures 2011