It is disheartening to see your own child feeling depressed because their self-esteem is at an all-time low. Perhaps they are not doing as well in school as they would like or maybe they are having a hard time making friends because they are shy. Whatever the reason may be, it is up to you, as their parent, to help build their self-esteem and make them realize they are more valuable and precious than they currently feel.
* Children love to feel that what they have to say is important and taken seriously. When you are having discussions around the dinner table about, say, an article you read or an event on the nightly news, ask your child what their opinion is on that subject, even if it may be beyond their normal scope of thinking. This teaches your child to challenge himself by forming his own opinions. Encourage conversation and debate. Your child will begin to feel that his opinion is valuable, important and acknowledged.
* Many parents love to baby their children, picking up after them and waiting on them hand and foot. There comes a time when children can do these things on their own. For example, once your child is old enough, he can be given a list of chores that he must perform weekly, like clearing the dinner table or washing the dishes. While he may not always look forward to it, he will feel that he is contributing to the household like an adult.
* You want to be the kind of parent that your child can easily talk to. If your child is feeling depressed about something or out of sorts, let her discuss her feelings with you without feeling you have to bombard her with advice. She may simply want to vent and have you help her gather her thoughts. Keep her ability to communicate with you about her day-to-day life always open.
* If your child is not doing as well as she would like to in school, but her best friend is, do not compare her to her best friend. Never compare your child to anybody, lest your child feel that you are disappointed in her performance and that you wish she were more like that other person. Understand that your child is her own developing person and that she will come into her own when she is ready. Comparing her to other children will accomplish nothing aside from decreasing her self-esteem.
* Maybe you made straight A’s all throughout your schooling, but your child is making only solid B’s. Remember you are two different people, so you need to be realistic in your expectations of her. Do not think that just because you were able to do one thing, your child will be able to, as well. Accept your child for who she is and be there to help her when she asks for it.
* It is hard to see your child make mistakes and fall down, but you must let your child make his own choices. We will not be able to hover over our children forever, so you must begin to let go and let your child start to make his own decisions and, yes, mistakes. If you see that your child is starting to procrastinate on, say, a science project that he has known about for weeks and your reminders to him that he must begin to work on it are going unheeded, you may need to back off. Hopefully, he learns how stressful procrastination can be.
