In the United States, religious practice has gone from a leading tenet of our country's founders to a vague afterthought in public life. In bygone days children were taught to pray and give thanks in school and at civic events. But today that has changed due to recent interpretations of the Constitutional principle mandating separation of church and state.
Though more than 90% of Americans claim to believe in God, fewer than 50% attend a place of worship on a regular basis (40 of 52 weeks in a year). Spiritual beliefs and practice are increasingly forbidden in government offices and state-held institutions. If you want your children to learn about spiritual values, you will need to teach them yourself.
1. Begin while the children are young. When they are old enough to sit in a high chair, help them fold small fingers to give thanks before a meal, or later, at bedtime, if this is your practice. Children learn a great deal during the first year of life, so introduce spiritual matters early.
2. Join a religious congregation for regular worship. Studies show that people who attend church or worship on a regular basis with like-minded believers live longer, healthier lives. They tend to marry younger and stay married longer, and are more successful in weathering the problems of life. Bestow these gifts on your children by enrolling them in youth services after you have checked them out to be sure kids are learning the values that hold significance for you.
3. Follow a scriptural set of teachings. The Torah, the Bible, and the Koran are examples of written scriptures that offer principled teachings for followers of the faiths they represent. Read the scriptures that you hold dear aloud to your children, and teach them to read the works for their own sake. Memorizing key passages of comfort or exhortation can prove helpful in times of trial. Some children's programs offer rewards for successful memorization.
4. Worship as a family. Share routine services, special events, scriptural readings, and fellowship with others of the same faith. Let your kids see that faith is a lifestyle, not a random event. Help them learn to celebrate life and sustain losses through their belief system.
5. Model the desired behavior. Let your kids catch you in prayer, meditation, scripture reading, or good deeds. A recent study suggests that even kids in their teen years are influenced more by parents than by peers. Your faith can provide a stepping stone to theirs.
6. Enroll them in youth programs. Most congregations offer services or programs for children. Start your kids when they are young, and they will be more likely to stick with it. Consider a private school that endorses or teaches your spiritual beliefs. Develop bonds with other families that share your faith and encourage the children to become acquainted.
7. Urge kids to read about their beliefs. Books and magazines offer commentaries and news stories on many religions. Help your kids learn about the world's view of their faith so they can prepare for the inevitable response when they leave home and go out on their own.
Some parents neglect teaching their kids about spiritual matters, saying they want the kids to choose for themselves. But kids cannot choose wisely if they know nothing about a particular faith system. Give them a solid grounding in your beliefs so they can grow and benefit from the role of faith in their lives.
