Body image encompasses many things. It is how we see ourselves. It is how we think others see us. It is how we feel about our body. Body image is not based on fact. It is based on several things, including learned behaviors about beauty, our mood, our self-esteem and what is going on in our lives. Body image is not static, it changes all the time. We all have good and bad days, days where we feel beautiful and days when we feel unattractive.
Helping your teen to have a good body image is important. There are a lot of things that parents can do to encourage their teens to look at themselves with a less critical and more educated eye. Here are some tips to help you do that.
The media, advertising, entertainment and diet industries set an impossible standard of beauty. Talk with your teen about how unrealistic these expectations are. Our society does not give our teens balanced messages about body image, so you need to do so through your words and actions. Point out that most magazine covers are airbrushed; many models and movie stars constantly starve themselves and eat in an unhealthy manner. Being thin is not the end all and be all of life. Even these famous, attractive people have life problems and body image issues. Emphasize that everyone would change something about himself or herself if they could.
Help your teen to understand that their weight and size of their body is just one part of the whole person that they are. There are other, more important things about them, including their personality, their talents and abilities and how they treat other people. Remind them to see their body as a whole, not as parts that they like and don’t like. Their body is an amazing machine that can perform a wide variety of tasks. How they look and how much they weigh is dependent upon many things, including genetics and lifestyle choices. Help them accept that there are all types of body sizes in the world, with none being better than another.
Learn about health, weight, nutrition and exercise as a family. Remind them that weight gain is a normal part of growing for teens. Learn to prepare healthy meals together. Encourage them to try new activities and find new things that they are good at doing. Teach them the facts and myths about these subjects so that they can counter negative body image thoughts and feelings with facts.
Teach them by example. Do not make negative comments about other people’s size, food choices, etc. Teach them to accentuate the positive in all things. If they are not always being judgmental about others, they can be more accepting of themselves. Projecting confidence, kindness to others, being intelligent and enjoying life are more important than how they look on the outside. True beauty radiates from within. It may sound trite, but it is true. Everyone knows someone who is beautiful on the outside but ugly on the inside. Their choices, words, and actions tell more about who they are than the way they look. If you can demonstrate this as a parent, it will be easier for your teen to follow in your footsteps.
Be an encouraging parent. Praise their efforts and abilities. Compliment them for actions as well as for looking nice. Build their self-esteem every chance you get. Give them healthy choices with food. Assist them in finding clothes that they like and are comfortable in, regardless of the current styles and trends. Eat together, play together and take advantage of every opportunity that comes along to improve their body image and self-esteem.
