Helping Children Cope After Divorce

A few tips for helping children after divorce so both of you can become well adjusted again.

DIVORCE- small word with a big meaning.

Today it seems Divorce is such a common thing to most familes: they just go to court and boom it is done and over- or is it?

What about the children? Adults seem to get over things pretty quick and move on, but it is the children that have a harder time dealing with losing one of their parents.

Children need more time to heal during a Divorce, and sometimes they aren't given that chance, think about having to deal with the loss of one of your parents (so to speak)

I feel that children need to be able to talk about how they feel and be able to get angry, be sad, whatever mood they are feeling: if they aren't given the time to heal, it can cause damage later on in life.

If you are planning a Divorce, sit down as a family and talk about it, let the children see how you as adults, are getting along enough to continue preparing for their future.

This will have a great effect on them instead of a negative one. After the Divorce try to keep their lives as routine as possible: they need something to hold on to that is linked to the life they used to have.

Always speak positive about the Ex- never, no matter how hard it gets, let them hear you put down the other parent: as children they will take this as a personal attack on them.

If the other parent was always a good parent (unless they have some sort of drug problem, or you left because of abuse) try to let them see him /her as often as possible so they won't feel that this person has walked out on them.

Let them know that is ok to cry about this loss, never teach the child to be so tough that they hold it all inside, because it will oneday come out and usually in a different form of emotion.

Try to keep your relationship alive and well with the children, if anything a Divorce should allow you even more time to do one on one things with the children.

And last but not least, make sure you & your ex let them know daily that you still and always will love them.

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