What is the key to making a marriage last? The keys to making a marriage last include respect, honesty, communication, and fun such as going on date nights. There has got to be respect - consistent respect,...
There has got to be respect - consistent respect, honesty, and communication. I think it's also really important to be friends and have fun. Sometimes if a couple loses that, it's often downhill from there.
I don't believe a relationship is ever doomed so long as two people are committed to working on it and making it work. Often times respect is lost, because somebody is hurt or angry. If that person can express, "Look, I am angry with you because I don't feel loved lately, and that's probably why I haven't been all that respectful," it helps the partner to understand where he or she is coming from.
There are phases and stages of love, and it's not realistic to expect that you are going to feel the same way you felt at the beginning of a relationship, 5, 10, or 20 years down the road. People who have that expectation often get into some trouble. I hear a lot of people say, "I love my partner, but I am not IN love with my partner." There are creative ways out there to recreate the excitement. You can actually grow to love your partner on a deeper level than you ever have before. Love deepens over time. That can be more rewarding than the butterflies in the stomach while dating.
A date night is still wonderful. I recommend that to every couple who comes into my office. I don't care if they have kids, and I don't care if there are money issues, there are ways to make it happen. It's got to be a priority. If they can't afford a sitter, they can use family. Date night is important, because you are nurturing the relationship like you did when you first met this person. When you first met, you probably went out of your way to make them feel special. Those are the things that get lost overtime. Just start doing some of those things again.
