Not sure how to get your kids to help around the house? Try tips like these to get them to lend a helping hand.
As toddlers grow into children, and children into teens, parents often wonder about the right time to assign chores. You will probably get the best results when you start putting the kids to work from the time they're old enough to walk.
Too young, you say? Not really. Teach them to pick up after themselves by putting toys away or helping the family by setting napkins on the table. If you expect them to balk, they will. Here are a few strategies to help them get started and keep going:
1. Make it a matter of expectancy. Before they start school, issue commands in a matter-of-fact voice:
"Don't forget to put your toys away before naptime."
"You can't leave those trucks on the table; put them in the toy box."
"Set this on the table, please."
Little ones are used to respecting authority, and will not question what you tell them to do. Just don't let hesitancy creep into your voice, or they will sense it and all will be lost.
2. As children get older, you may need to swap expectancy for family business. Make a list of chores the kids can help with and let them choose a few that are age-appropriate. Arrange this in such a way that it seems routine. You may want to start giving an allowance about this time, though some parents prefer to differentiate between allowance and chores. However you do it, help your kids to become aware of benefits they receive as part of the family and the role they are expected to play in doing their share of chores.
3. Preteens may need a little prodding. The use of allowance, privileges, or extra earned income for more personal work. Some parents assign washing the car or taking siblings to sports practice in this category. Children who misbehave may be assigned additional chores as part of the penalty, as this consequence can be very effective. When kids skip chores or do a sloppy job, hold off rewarding the next privilege, such as a trip to the mall or an outing with friends, until the work is done properly.
4. Help teens realize the valuable role they play. As kids become more mature, they may see for themselves or need help in understanding the important contribution they make to family life. Remind them of this coming-of-age passage with verbal praise:
"What would we do without you?"
"You're much better at decorating/cleaning/baking than I am."
"You have a knack for this; I'm impressed. Will you show me how you do it?"
You can also award unexpected dividends to show your appreciation and to prompt similar responsible actions:
"Why don't you go with your friends to the mall? I'll finish the kitchen. You did such a terrific job cleaning the cupboards that we'll both get done quicker."
5. There may be times when you need to have a serious talk with your child. It may be when he gets in trouble or when she doubts herself. Perhaps the family will experience a divorce, which will lead to the reassignment of some roles. Be frank and gentle with your child while emphasizing that you expect her to step up to the plate for the tasks that need done. Be sure not to overwhelm your son or daughter when he or she is dealing with other issues as well or may be having a bad day.
Child rearing involves many facets of training, include housekeeping and lawn care. Don't overlook this valuable opportunity to teach your children about their role in maintaining a comfortable living environment and making a positive contribution to the family.
