Tips for planning a marriage ceremony

As recent films have depicted, a wedding planner may be an actual professional position whereby someone is paid to produce a beautiful, memorable event. Since most people can't afford to hire a professional planner, we arrange family weddings ourselves.

If you are helping to plan a wedding, whether yours or someone else's, here are a few ideas that can help:

1. Get the input of everyone whose opinion is needed. In addition to the bride and groom, of course, this might include both sets of the couple's parents (and perhaps step-parents, if applicable), along with soliciting ideas from siblings or even grown children. That way no one will be offended when you consult everyone and try to use a little bit from each person's views.

2. Establish a budget. Decide in advance how much money you will have for the entire event, from the rehearsal dinner to the wedding reception. Then figure out where the money will come from and what each item will cost. Things to consider include the hall rental, church, pastor's fee, organist, musical performers, bridesmaids' gifts, wedding gown and accoutrements, reception meal and entertainment, and a host of related costs. Get estimates for each item, like the wedding cake and reception hall, to get the best price. Then don't stray from your budget when other unplanned expenses come along unless they're truly needed.

3. Create a timeline. Ideally, you need from six to twelve months or longer to plan a formal wedding. The church or reception area may be booked a year or more in advance, so plan and reserve early. You will need to schedule time for photographs, dress fittings, rehearsal, and many other tasks before the actual day of the wedding. Coordinate everyone's calendars ahead of time so you won't unexpectedly lose a bridesmaid due to vacation, etc.

4. Choose a suitable theme. This usually involves colors for decorations that will be used at the church with flowers and at the reception in terms of the cake and tableware. You can post banners, photographs, and other memorabilia on the dining tables to court a specific mood. Invitations and placemats can help to create a certain tone in the phrasing used and the sentiments that are expressed.

5. Double-check everything. From dress alterations to the catered meal, call a few days in advance to make sure the preparations are proceeding on schedule. If there is a hitch, you can deal with it sooner than later, preventing last-minute problems or disappointments at the wedding. It might be a good idea to have a backup as well. For example, if the musician can't sing due to illness, is there a family member who can step in at the last minute?

Planning a wedding is something like organizing a conference or running a business for a short time. Everyone has a job to do that needs to be supervised by the wedding planner. Enlist help early so you don't end up too frazzled to enjoy the day that you have helped to make special.