Long distance relationship advice: ideas for helping kids (and grown-ups) stay in touch and remain close to loved ones and relatives who live far away.
I believe that it is important for families to stay in touch, even when distances prevent frequent visits. Adding children to the picture may create more of a challenge since it is difficult for them to be familiar with someone without direct contact. However, it is important for them to establish a relationship with distant relatives, especially if those relatives happen to be grandparents. If you take a little time and put some thought into it, it's relatively easy to find ways to help your kids stay in touch with family members and create a lasting bond. An added bonus is that you'll be staying in touch and strengthening ties as well.
Don't forget about good old-fashioned letters. Older children can practice their writing skills by composing letters to relatives. Younger children can draw pictures or even scribble and have Mom "translate" what they wrote. Even babies who are too young for scribbling can have their handprint traced on a piece of paper to send to Grandma. Children love to receive mail, too, so remind the relatives to send a letter or card in return.
Speaking of cards, another good idea is to remember relatives' birthdays. Compile a list of everyone's special day and record it on a calendar in a central place. At the appropriate time, have your child make a card or select one at the store to send. When the date arrives, remind your child of the birthday and speak of the person throughout the day.
In today's high-tech world, e-mail is another easy way of keeping in touch. Children love a chance to navigate on the computer, and this will give them an opportunity to learn and keep in touch at the same time. If you have lots of relatives with e-mail, a good way for the whole family to stay in contact is by creating a chain e-mail (no, not the annoying kind that will bring you happiness and wealth if you send it along!). Send a chatty e-mail to the first person on your list - describe what your family did on that day or a funny thing your child said. The recipient should then add news from his family and forward the message to the next person. Eventually, the e-mail (which should have grown by now) will make it back to the sender. This method would also work with regular mail.
Photographs are also important for keeping in touch. From the distant grandparent's standpoint, pictures are essential since children change and grow so rapidly. And from the child's point of view, pictures are equally important to help them visualize an absent relative. Post pictures in a prominent place in your home or create an album for your child. "Visit" the photographs often, encouraging the child to talk about who the people are and what they remember about them. I like to send regular photographs and "update" newsletters at Christmas and each child's birthday. A fun way to create updates for young children is to write a letter from their point of view. Older children can compose their own updates about their current likes and dislikes.
Whenever possible, record videotapes to send. These can vary from simply capturing day-to-day activities to having the whole family get involved in creating a movie. Grandparents can read a favorite story for their grandchildren or simply reminisce about their childhoods. Cassette tapes also work well for recording stories or songs to send to each other.
Phone calls are another great way to keep in touch. At our house, the kids love to get phone calls and are little chatterboxes when they get hold of the receiver. Have kids call relatives on their birthdays or to tell them about a special event like a lost tooth or a good report card.
Finally, try to schedule visits as much as possible. You may want to consider meeting each other halfway for a vacation. Some families hold a reunion at rotating locations each year to try to accommodate everyone.
Try to teach your kids that we can all remain close in our hearts even if we can't always be together. With a little effort, it is easy for families to stay in touch, even over long distances.
