An introduction to the basics of wedding rehearsal dinners, including tradition, hosts, formality, locations, themes, guest list, and other tips.
The groom's family traditionally hosts the rehearsal dinner, but today many couples choose to host the party themselves, or both sets of parents collaborate to create a momentous occasion. Grandparents, siblings, or close friends could also organize the dinner. The purpose is the same no matter who the host is: it is a chance for the families to get to know one another in an informal setting. It also allows the bride and groom to spend more time with close friends and family, especially out-of-town attendees, since they will not have much time to socialize on the wedding day.
Different settings create different atmospheres for the rehearsal dinner. Hotels, upscale restaurants, and rented pavilions are formal venues, while a bowling alley, park, or beach provides a casual locale. The time of day varies as well - a morning rehearsal may be followed by a brunch or lunch picnic, while an evening rehearsal may lead to a more substantial meal.
It's easy to add individuality and flair to a rehearsal dinner with a theme. Luaus, clambakes, and beach themes are the most popular, but the couple's hobbies, professions, or interests can easily be incorporated into an appropriate theme. Another trend is to theme the rehearsal dinner around the impending honeymoon, whether it is a tropical getaway, island cruise, ski vacation, or European tour.
Whom to invite to the rehearsal dinner can be tricky. The guest list could be as small as just the bride and groom, or could include a significant percentage of wedding guests. As a general rule, the officiant and all the participants should be invited, along with their significant others. Many couples include out-of-town guests, allowing them more time to visit with the bride and groom before the flurry of the wedding day. Close friends and family members may also attend. Remember that many people who attend the rehearsal dinner do not attend the actual rehearsal - that is reserved solely for the participants.
If the rehearsal dinner is taking on proportions equal to a pre-wedding wedding, it is wise to trim the guest list. To accomplish this without offending anyone, couples may schedule the rehearsal two or three days before the wedding, rather than the night before. This way, many out-of-town guests have not yet arrived, and the rehearsal can be kept more confidential. A welcome party or informal gathering can still be held with friends and family prior to the wedding, unassociated with the rehearsal.
The primary purpose of the rehearsal dinner is to relax, mingle, and socialize. Unlike the wedding reception, which has a strict timeline for toasts, cake cutting, dancing, garter or bouquet tossing, and photography, the rehearsal dinner has very few activities. Parents, grandparents, and attendants may offer elaborate toasts, which avoids too many toasts during the reception. The bride and groom should take the time to personally thank their attendants and anyone who has worked to make their wedding dreams come true, including parents and friends. Many times, the couple presents gifts to their attendants or helpful friends to say thank you.
Other rehearsal dinner activities range from quirky party games to limbo contests, practical jokes, and competitions. There may be photographs, scrapbooks, or even a slide show to commemorate the couple's relationship, which serves as an additional way to introduce the couple to one another's families. All in good fun, the rehearsal dinner brings the families closer.
If the rehearsal dinner is the night before the wedding, it is important to wrap up the celebration early enough for everyone to be completely rested on the big day. Additionally, alcohol should be carefully monitored to avoid overindulgence, which could create problems the next morning.
For many couples, the wedding rehearsal and rehearsal dinner is the kickoff to the wedding celebration. With a relaxing location, good food, and the company of close friends and family, the rehearsal dinner is the perfect prelude to any couple's marital bliss.
