Strategies For Conflict Resolution

Strategies for conflict resolution. There are different strategies for conflict resolution in a marriage. Well, you can start with "I really want to hear you, but it's really hard when you speak in that way...

Well, you can start with "I really want to hear you, but it's really hard when you speak in that way or in that tone." You are expressing an intention to try to get it solved, but you know that it is not going to work with the way its going. Sometimes couples need to take a break, and say "let's get back to this later" and that's part of the work on yourself and with your partner, knowing and making that happen. I am a therapist; people need a third person present to slow down the interaction to make sure everyone is heard a lot of times. It can be really horrible one-on-one, because that one-on-one can stir up some of the deepest impulses of self-preservation and attack. So having a third person present, if you are finding that you can't resolve conflict, can help immensely. Try to do it before you hate each other. I get so many couples coming in for whom the patterns have gone on for five or ten years longer than they should. They should have really been getting help. Sometimes things have gotten so damaged and feelings are so hurt and there is so much negative history that it is impossible to repair. At the same time, I've seen couples who I thought were done with each other who really did turn it around. It's hard to know, sometimes they think that people have to move on.

© High Speed Ventures 2011