Find out ways that you can be supportive of an individual who is suffering from depression.
Almost one in ten people suffer from some sort of depressive disorder. This means that you are highly likely to encounter someone who is struggling with depression at your workplace, among your friends or even within your own family. Many people experience a desire to help the depressed person, but what can you do?
Don't take it Personally
Often, people with depression will withdraw from their usual social activities. They may not be as talkative, or as inclined to return phone calls. A depressed person who subscribes to the idea of "If you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all," may find themselves isolating themselves, because of worry about what others will think about their changed mood.
Other individuals who are depressed may feel more agitated than usual, and sound snappish or short-tempered with others. If this is a sudden personality change, you may be dealing with someone who is dealing with this disease. Try not to take the behavior personally. This is not to say that you should accept abusive behavior, rather that it is not your fault, and there is no need to exacerbate the situation by becoming defensive.
Be Informed
Depression can be a difficult disease to understand. Even today, some people still disagree on what causes this disorder. Most concur that it is due to a chemical imbalance in the brain, however, that can be exacerbated or brought on by stressful life events. Sometimes there may not be a specific event to point to. Since it is an invisible disorder, it is one of the most likely diseases to be misunderstood. It may be difficult for people to understand that depression is a disease just like any other. It must be treated in order for the person to stay healthy. One of the worst things that people can say to a depressed person is, "Just snap out of it." Unfortunately, it doesn't work that way, any more than a diabetic can stop taking insulin and get better by simply deciding to through sheer willpower.
Stay in Contact
Since the depressed person may be avoiding socializing with you, or may appear grouchy, many people will distance themselves from the individual. This is one of the worst things that can happen. Isolation does not cure depression; rather, it can exacerbate it. It is important that the person has the support of their family, friends and colleagues while they are seeking help for their disease. Even if the person seems to be avoiding you, stay in contact, so that they know you are there for them, even if they don't feel up to their usual social activities.
Be the Person's Cheerleader
Sometimes, you can make an enormous impact in the life of someone who is depressed by affirming that he or she is a competent, lovable individual. Depression has a way of inserting negative thoughts into a person's head, causing them to dwell on negative ideas such as not being a good enough parent, worker or friend. Depression may make a person feel that they are worthless. You can help the individual combat these feelings by affirming that they are a good friend, competent worker, etc.
The person suffering from depression may need an extra push. Show up in your walking shoes and ask the person to go for a walk with you. Tell them that it would make your walk much nicer. Studies show that walking decreases depression. Invite them to a comedic movie. Be insistent!
Help the Individual Find Assistance
Sometimes depression does not pass easily, regardless of the support that the individual receives. You can do all of the things listed above, but ultimately, you may not be able to have an effect on the individual's depression at all. This can feel frustrating. Encourage the person to find help in his or her community. Perhaps counseling or a visit to a psychiatrist is in order. If the individual does not have very many funds, usually a counselor who works on a sliding scale basis can be found.
You are doing the best that you can to be a supportive person. This can be very helpful, but is not guarantee that the person will overcome the depression. Be sure to take time out for yourself as well, so that you do not start to feel down because progress is slow or stagnant, as it often can be. Give yourself a pat on the back for being a good friend, partner or colleague.
