How to talk to your spouse about stress

This seems to be mostly a male problem. Men have trouble expressing their feelings. For some reason women are able to express themselves with greater ease. This is just the way it is in society. But men are getting better at opening up. It is becoming more acceptable even admirable for men to discuss their inner demons.

The best way to begin talking about what causes stress is to get to a certain comfort level. This level can be easily attained if trust can be developed with a wife, husband, or significant other. One must feel free enough to express exactly what is causing stress without feeling guilty or uncomfortable. It is a fact that it is difficult for shy or reticent people to open up with strangers. It should be easy to talk with someone who is intimate or well known to the person suffering from stress. Even though it may be difficult the importance of being able to discuss these problems cannot be overstressed, no pun intended.

The first thing to do before discussing the causes of stress with a spouse is to put everything else on the backburner and find a good relaxed bit of time when no interruptions will interfere. These discussions can prove to be very important in life. The road to well-being is an open road but only if time is taken out of busy schedules to access it.

Once a level of comfort and relaxation is achieved the ease of discussion will aid in the ability to express sources of stress. A nice quiet environment is conducive to serious dialogue. For instance it would be difficult to discuss these matters in a noisy shopping mall or restaurant.

Before embarking on the discussion of sources of stress one should carefully think through exactly how to approach the way to divulge what some would call resentments. There are some things that cause stress which can make a spouse feel uncomfortable, hurt, or even angry. Some areas of stress involve delicate, embarrassing, or surprising facts. This should not in any way retard the effort to discuss what things are causing stress. Generally it is advised that children not be present or privy to these talks. While there certainly are times to talk with children about their stresses and such, these talks should be with an adult and face-to-face. In fact children are often a source of stress and therefore the need to discuss things when they are not present. Some facts let out during these talks may be too intense or adult for children.

It is important to be candid about what causes stress. It is also important to talk about everything. Do not leave anything out. Do not save anything for later discussions. It is now or never. No guts no glory. So it goes without saying that these talks may take some time. But the importance of discussing the sources of stress must not be done in starts and jerks. Lay everything on the table. Give the other person time to absorb everything. Do not pressure them into reacting to news they may not exactly want to hear.