How To Write A Funeral Eulogy Speech

Tips on writing and delivering a funeral eulogy speech.

A eulogy is a speech that is given to commemorate a person's life. Eulogies are normally given at funerals and are usually given by a family member or a close friend of the departed person. The person giving the eulogy hopes to pay a tribute to their departed loved one by remembering the good things the loved one has done and the great memories they have shared with the person. Though it may not be as personal, it is acceptable to have a pastor or clergyman present the eulogy if the family members are unable to do so. Times of death can be very difficult for families and friends, and it may be easier for some families to not have to write and deliver a speech during their time of grief.

Each eulogy can be very different from another. Some eulogy writers may write a serious speech, causing the audience to shed tears of remembrance, while some others prefer to write a more uplifting speech, with perhaps a bit of humor, causing the audience to laugh or smile at fond memories they shared with the deceased. They may wish to remember their happiest times with their loved one, or share quotes or sayings that the departed used. Eulogies with a bit of up-lifting humor are often the best ones as they make the service a bit easier on the guests and the speaker, who are often overcome with emotion. It is often easier to reflect on past times with a loved one with happiness and laughter, than with tears and sadness.

Candice Valero said this of a funeral she attended for a family member that was killed in a tragic accident: "I was dreading attending the funeral because I had been crying so much since my uncle was killed, I was certain that the service would make me cry even more. His best friend delivered his eulogy and it was wonderful. He made us laugh and smile as he told funny stories about my uncle. He reminded us of my uncle's boisterous laugh and how he was always such a jokester. The entire audience laughed when he said he knew my uncle was in heaven, telling jokes to the angels. . . he just hoped the jokes were clean ones! It was a huge relief to smile and remember the happy times with him."



If you are ever called upon to deliver a eulogy, your first duty will be to write a eulogy that will pay respect to the deceased. You will want to give it a great deal of thought. The eulogy should always refer to the person you are writing about in a positive manner. Never speak badly about the person or bring up bad memories for any of the guests. Eulogies should be reserved for paying your final respects to your loved one, they should always be positive and uplifting and focus on the better qualities of the departed person. Write about memories with loving detail about the deceased person and your relationship with that person. Make sure your speech is written clearly and understandably. If you are speaking about a memory you have of the departed person that all other guests may not be familiar with, fill them in by saying, "I remember when . . .". They will enjoy hearing the happy memories about their loved one.

If the deceased person had a particularly strong relationship with anyone, it is a kind thought to mention this person and their relationship and talk about how important this person, or persons, were to the deceased.

Keep in mind when you are writing your eulogy that you should acknowledge the person for who they were, paying respect to their true personality. Never make up things or events about the person to make them seem like a better person than they were. Speak honestly, truthfully and from the heart. Try to incorporate things about the person that the other guests will be able to relate to. Don't share personal or intimate things in your eulogy, things that you wouldn't say if the person were still living. Some things should remain between you and the memory of your loved one.

When writing a eulogy, give it a lot of thought and preparation, but when you're reading your eulogy to the guests, talk to the audience as though you were talking to a friend, not as if you are giving a speech. Speak slowly and clearly while looking around the room at the guests. Speak about the person as if you are telling another friend how great your loved one was. Make them laugh at happy memories of their loved one, make them happy to be there paying a tribute to the deceased.

You should have no problems writing a eulogy if you keep it honest and write what is in your heart. Whether it's serious or light-hearted, as long as it comes from you, it will be a loving tribute to your loved one.

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